As I look upon the photos of the gurgling creek, vast rocks and emerald sea, a tinge of wistfulness rose. As much as I love my haute couture and bling, I'm most at ease in slippers and sportswear. Been lulled into thinking that I'm back into this nomadic lifestyle that I've left behind 4 years ago. (Has it been that long?)It's time to return to reality. That makes me just a little pensive. I'm going to miss the green and brown. I'm going to sorely miss the 8½hr sleeps. I'm going to miss the simple goals set for each day.
Sorted out alot of thoughts. I reorganized some feelings and ritually dumped many. I've to stop being so selfish and wilful. I've faced my fears and the demons. So be it. The disquiet has been assuaged. Finally had time to come to terms with many issues. I've accepted the fact that the free-spirited travelling beach bum lifestyle I've dropped isn't going to be picked up again. At long last, I quashed the hope of revisiting the writing industry. I've to re-define what becomes me.
Looking back this past decade, I've been bestowed with amazing experiences. I've been incredibly blessed with countless intangible gains and material comforts. Am I happy? Yes. Since I was a little girl, I've been in control of my own life. I intend to keep it that way. I take calculated risks. I weigh my options. I make my choices and live with the consequences. There is recognition, and thanksgiving for the many blessings in my life. I have narrowed my priorities and set aside some space for expected additions.
Welcome home, me.
14 comments:
a blessed life nevetheless! =p
So well-written. Your reflections made me want to sit back and think about my life too.
Welcome home, imp.
a bit too early to have such strict definition about who you are and where you are at, my friend.
life has many surprises yet in store of you. and you will live through the experiences with courage and grace.
live life as it unfolds.
welcome home imp.
it's been a good one indeed. i hope you've sorted all the stuff. one enjoyable trip indeed. good to have u back.
ah man, i really envy the being able to relax n READ all the books u wanna read, catch up on books than the spa n food bit. ^;^
I am envious. It's great that you have found contentment in your life. I wish I have such clear vision ahead of me. Looks like I really need that vacation!
elaine: :)
natasha + + meteor + yuling: thanks.
sinlady: but but...since i was little, i always knew who i am and what i wanna be....kinda...haven't deviated too far! :) circumstances will change for sure. i hope i will have the grace like you said. :)
cavalock: life. indeed.
eveline: i only have a vision of how i will live my life and what i want to do. but the other stuff, i just deal with them as they come. the underlying attitudes don't change very much. you NEED a vacation. SOON. you've been facing so much pressure!!!
There are people who travel to discover new places and there are people (life you) who travel to discover themselves.
I would dare say your discovery is a greater one. Very inspiring indeed. Maybe it's time to do that lone holiday I have been thinking about.
- hobomobo
hobomobo: i guess at some point, every one of us will travel specifically to discover ourselves. or on a spiritual journey. or something. i suppose the time has come for you to take a step back and re-look too? maybe this is why my trip appeals. :)
great reflections,babe.
Its a spiritual inner-self understanding and discovery that brings us to enlightment and ability to lead a better, enriching life.
I need to go on a trip soon!
Welcome home!
I've been following your entries on the trip and I have to admit your photos and what you've written have called forth the wanderlust in me. I need a vacation! :-)
~CDR~
Welcome back :)
Expected additions??
nuttyjas: yes! a trip that spans longer than 4-5 days will be great! a change of scenery so to speak.
CDR: :) i considered going somewhere far away and new. then i decided i want somewhere familiar and near. somewhere comfortable. but i can still ferret out the beauty.
kachunknorge: OF PRIORITIES babe! not little humans or anything like that!!! AHHHHHHHHHH!
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