It was a short work week, but super intense. This is turning out to be a year of conference panels at work. Almost fun, save for the work part. Tehehehee. That kills brain cells. But it feels awesome to be working the brains and keeping the edges sharp. I don't get to meet many friends or sane acquaintances now, so it's a welcomed thing to meet some of them at these work events.
I need easy shoes for these full-day things. It's not fun having the feet bound up in tight shoes all day. Some women can do it; I'm not one of those. I don't own heels much anymore. Unless they're in the form of loafers. I need to cover distance, and that can't have me tottering in pain within an hour of arriving at the conference venue.
I have no idea how this year's work projects blew up into busy work weeks spanning months. Aside from my usual projects, I have continuous conferences to attend (and work at) on the calendar. Q2 is mad; Q3 seems to be chaotic too. I sure ain't complaining. It will pay my next year's bills very nicely.
Back-to-back conferences for weeks on end mean that I needed to decompress. That meant spending time alone in silence. That included not talking to the husband, and not even eating meals with him; he's used to it by now. Hurhurhur Of course the dog doesn't mind. Dog feels my vibes more than needing to hear my voice.
Work ended at 9pm and I needed dinner and a whisky. Some colleagues needed the same. It had been a tiring three nights at work. It was absolutely intense. We still have a ton of analysis to do, and a conclusion report to write. We're not that close, and we're not friends. But because we don't actually work in the same office, we oddly don't mind one another's company for a bit. I've worked with them for years, and they're absolutely great people to work with.
We stopped by Hubsat Siglap for a perk-me-up before bedtime. It was a central location for everyone to get home to after dinner and light drinks. Everyone just wanted whisky and Guinness to wind down, and bar bites to pad the tummy. We didn't even stay till midnight. We left at 11pm. Lovely.
I didn't make a reservation and simply walked in. There was space for us, but limited portions of pork biryani. Luckily for us, we had enough to go around. The colleagues also wanted other things like pies, and fish and chips. I definitely wanted those fried cuttlefish balls. The sambal belachan that it came with was so spicy-delicious. My soda to whisky ratio was way high. I didn't want that much alcohol. I wanted refreshing! This means 15% whisky and 85% soda. Tehehehee.
I didn't have to, but I found myself agreeing to cover a facilitator-associate's 'night shifts' at three focus group sessions over three nights. She fell sick, but she had done all the prep work. She just needed someone competent to deliver it. It's an easy three nights, and it pays nicely.
It isn't a particularly crazy week of deadlines in my bread and butter freelance projects, so I decided to do it. I need to keep the brains active, sharpen my edge and see if I can still match the market demands. I didn't agree to these 'night shifts' out of ego lah! But since the organizers/clients welcomed me to join in the group facilitation for these sessions, I really didn't mind. After all, nobody ever minded more (legitimate) income. This decision might also have been pushed by the fact that my annual medical insurance coverage increased (age bracket lah), and last week, I literally just paid a bomb in premiums.
As it is, my hours are pretty flexible, and since I'm willing to put in these hours at work, then I might as well do it if I have a window. How much I earn is directly proportionate to how hard I work. I earn enough to pay all my bills, spend on whatever I want to, and on Choya. Yes, I have to pay taxes. I'm comfortable. I'm thankful for that.
With this freelance gig that has sort of organically developed and trundled along for the past decade without me having to schmooze much, I'm very pleased. This means that the classic concept of retirement from a job doesn't apply to me. I probably can do this for another 6-8 years. It could be more, but we'll have to see what the market says.
As I near 50 years old, of course I wonder what this freelance gig would become, and how the projects might dry up. That's not my worry. One must diversify income streams. When I have no children's trust funds and medical insurance to consider; if I haven't done my Math and financial planning by this age, I'm not much of a competent human living in an urban city, am I?
The worry is — I need to have a think if my sense of self is also shaped by my work identity. That is the thing. I'm not obligated to offices and the social circles of colleagues and the peripheral matters like that. Well, I've never really bothered about 'belonging' to any office. While I like the administrative and tech support that an office provides, I don't like anything else about it. Synergy, dynamism, buzz and all that, sure. But I do not like the politicking. However, I'm not immune to the saying 'work keeps one relevant to society'.
One day, the projects will dry up. When that day comes, I don't know if I could swallow that realization graciously. I'd need to find something else (on top of my charity projects) to do on a regular basis to maintain the mental sharpness. Intellectual skills need to be constantly honed.
I was a bit flooded by work (paid and unpaid) over last week, the weekend and this week. It was a tad annoying because a portion of it requires putting on my game face to deal with human emotions. I'm not practiced at that. I probably came across as ridiculously mean. But it's a good thing! I didn't intend to plunge so deep into work in January; I was hoping to do so in February, but all right. I'll take it.
I had to get off my lazy ass and run to five venues over nine hours on both Saturday and Sunday. I found a slot to take Choya for a scheduled heartworm (and hookworm) vaccination jab; and kept her quiet for the rest of the day. Thankfully the 'second monsoon surge' didn't pelt down. They were just rain showers and drizzle. Whewwww. She was perfectly fine because there was almost no thunder at all.
I had to find somewhere to plonk the dog to entertain her too. She went off to her 'Sunday Doggos Social Club' at Potong Pasir where all her Aunties were happy to have her sit with them for a few hours. Then she also managed to get a date for a pack walk. That kept her really thrilled. She'll hang out at Ryo's for a bit this week too. The man is a tad busy, but his schedule isn't as packed as mine. So I put him in charge to pick up the dog and feed her the mid-day meal. Heh. Dog seems rather pleased overall.
I don't like leaving the dog alone for more than four hours a day. She'll do okay (if there isn't thunder) because she is very assured and comfortable at home. She knows we go away and we'll come back. Still. This Smol Girl dictates my schedule and sets a nightly curfew. Well, she needs her supper and a bedtime walk. So this means I'll always be home before 11pm, preferably at 10pm so I don't have to sleep at 1am.
I can of course do a few hours a week at any client's office or commit to two/three-day conferences. But I honestly can't imagine being stuck in an office full-time without the option of working-from-home at least for two days a week. My current flexible schedule of satisfying freelance and charity projects pays my bills, and is optimal for the dog, and my glutes and spine.
Work projects are petering off as we head into Thanksgiving and the year-end quiet. That's just for these few weeks. I have projects lined up in Q1 and Q2 2025, so while work is winding down, I also have meetings to do recaps, debriefs and set 'deliverables' for the next two quarters.
Good gawwd. 'Deliverables' is such a fun word that I probably read it and heard it like 100 times that day. I could afford to roll my eyes double since many meetings were done via video-calls and I didn't turn on my screen. Ha.
I am thankful that work is steady and fairly paid. The nature of freelance work is unpredictable. I admit that I don't need that much to keep me in the black, but I truly enjoy the brainwork, the intellectual discourse and to keep the mental edge sharp.
At least many of these meetings are done while I sip a hot cup of well-brewed coffee. And the dog is at my feet. Then I don't have to worry about her going berserk at home from hearing thunder in this horrible week of afternoon rains. As usual, caffeine in the form of coffee always make me a nicer person to talk to.
I have a few go-to coffeeshops to work out of. Great coffee, steady wifi and they don't grouse that I hang out that for 90 minutes. Yes, I could work at home, but I would rather step out sometimes since I need to take the dog for a walk anyway. Looking at the weather patterns, these rains come in the afternoons, so when we can get some morning sun, I'd rather do that for her. This means changing my schedule. So be it. It's part and parcel of choosing to be an involved pawrent.
It has been a long month at work. Whenever I have to physically turn up at conferences and panels, it takes a lot out of me. I have to be present in body and mind, and not allow my mind to wander. The brains are literally sharpened to the demands of the topics 85% of the day for an intense four or six hours. Then I can’t brain after. It's amazingly satisfying though.
On hectic days like these, I go light at lunch because I wouldn't be tasting the food that much — I'm eating to fill the stomach and anything easy would do. No carbs because I can't afford to fall asleep after. In the nights, I'm depleted and oddly don't have much of an appetite to eat either. My social battery would be super low and I'm not that keen on socializing either.
That night, the man asked me if I wanted dinner at a sushi joint. I declined. He was referring to a fancy one. I wasn't keen to pay S$500 for dinner. Not even S$350. I also didn't have three hours to spend on a meal. I wanted a super casual and easy <$100 meal done in 1.5 hours. Hahaha. Okay can. We stopped by one of our usual haunts. I won't tell you which one because they quietly allow Choya to come with.
Picked out easy pieces of sushi. Had them seared too. Had ourselves a pretty decent dinner. Got home early enough to wind down a bit longer with a book instead of rushing through the pre-bedtime thingies.
This final two-day workshop completed the full Leadership Development Program that S put together for her client. To think July's workshops were only two months back. It felt like ages since. Yay! We did it! Okay, mainly S still. I honestly had zero contributions to it. When this isn't my bread and butter, it really is no sweat simply assisting and doing note-taking.
Yes, I had the time and mind-space to do this project. I made time for it. Initially, S and I didn't discuss a full commitment beyond the first workshop. I didn't even know her set dates, which moved a couple of times because of the client's availability as well. Somehow, it evolved to this, and somehow, I always had the window for her dates.
It has been really fun working with S, and through the entire series of workshops, I got a refresher in leadership structures and methodology, as well as change management approaches. It was great. Hearing the different and diverse opinions and analyses expressed by the participants keeps my own edge. These are your APAC and regional heads and directors, as well as their deputies. I was privileged to hear from people in a different industry (from mine).
I'm just tickled because in these final workshops, S and I were totally color-coordinated even without discussing it, albeit in our individual styles. LOLOLOL This had happened even right from our first workshops. It was great doing this with S. I thank her for the trust and confidence in me.
We're at the halfway mark of a series of Leadership Development Workshops that S has put together. While I'm absolutely familiar with the tiers of a leadership program, I lend neither help nor expertise to this workshop. That is entirely on S. I'm the notetaker and am simply... assisting.
This week, we completed the third set of the series. The two-day workshop ran smoothly without much hiccups. The participants were interested and engaged. Behind the scenes was all of S's hard work. I didn't even help her do up the deck of slides.
I'm picky about facilitators I work with because everyone has a different approach and manner to a workshop, and I have preferences, depending on the clients and their intended audience as well. I generally don't tell facilitators why I picked them or not, because I'm mindful of their feelings. It’s unnecessary to have to overthink. What I'm looking for, is someone who doesn't come across as snooty, patronizing or middling. I don’t want them to do juvenile or silly activities. The facilitator’s tone of voice and cadence of language are most important to me. Some facilitators are just great, and some simply suck.
When I watched S lead the workshop, the image of her as my friend dissipated. In place, she had put on a facilitator's hat. It was a pleasure watching S do her job so beautifully. Each workshop takes a lot out of her. It isn't just about the content. It's the interaction with the participants and how genuine she is.
When the workshop was successfully completed, we breathed a sigh of relief. Hurrah. We adjourned to The Elephant Room for some excellent cocktails. Since we were hungry, we also had an early dinner. The bar serves up some really decent reinterpreted Indian food. The lamb shank and shredded Kerala beef were excellent, and we were hoping for a portion of carbs to go along with them, but the kitchen doesn't offer basmati rice or naan.
I prefer not to work with friends unless it's a charity project, or a one-off project, say a conference or panel discussion, or prep for an article or a feature, the sorts. Those are fun! I certainly do not do 'business' with friends to 'share' in a restaurant/cafe/pet business, et cetera. I do not do investments with friends who are bankers. I keep those strictly separate. Money and friends, often, don't go together this way.
If I view someone as a friend, we do not talk about money. The moment we do, we're not friends anymore. This motto has served me well through the years, allowing me to sift out the gems who are still friends with me today. I can't be more glad that the BFF and the dear faeriefolk share my views on this matter.
At S's invitation, I tagged along to the a two-day leadership development workshop that she was facilitating. This is the first set of a whole series of workshops. I was at this workshop to do administrative things. S needed to keep her mind on the reading mood of the participants, walking through the design of the program and guiding the direction she needed the conversations would go. In leadership programs like this, I like to assist the lead facilitator and keep program participants in line. My strength is not in talking to people. I don't like to lead a workshop. I prefer to facilitate small group conversations if required, since I've been extensively trained to do that. So I'm not entirely useless. Hahaha!
I requested for payment in kind — coffee, lunch, AC, wifi, a comfy chair and table. After all, my work isn't a similar industry, I'm neither a competitor nor a freelance trainer. I don't even know how to quote a fee to S. I'm quite happy to just hang out for two days because the dates coincided with a break between my own (paying) projects. I took it as an opportunity to pad up corporate experiences in a different industry. Of course the bonus was to have lunch with her for the two days. Hahaha. Lunch was quick and utilitarian before we ran off for a 10-minute down time to reset before beginning the afternoon session.
In an ancient analogy of a power structure, I wouldn't be a good Emperor or Prime Minister. I'd be an ideal war advisor hiding in the shadows and I'm happiest to remain as that. I'm not on LinkedIn and I don't need to 'network'; I'm really awkward at that. I'm just thankful that my new projects continue to roll in without my having to 'sell myself' very much. I do best at analysis, research, paperwork, reading the room and formulating a strategy.
I wasn't intending to do actual work or start on any new projects till next week or so. But a potential work project was mooted, and an impromptu meet meant that the pet-friendly Plain Meredith at the brand new One Holland Village mall was ideal because I was already out with Choya and this was near the clients' office.
I had no intention of checking out this pet-friendly cafe because, well, as nice as the decor is, it's still a pet cafe, and the food will be middling. However, the clients own dogs too, and understood that I'd be hard pressed to meet now if I have a dog alongside. The only way I could do now was the clients agreeing to meet at a pet-friendly cafe. I work with extremely short and tight deadlines, so I have got no problems with clients wanting 'now'.
Luckily I was in casual but respectable clothing for a first meet with potential clients! I didn't go home to change, obviously. I just toddled down from where I was earlier at One North. Was wearing fun earrings gifted by J from Teeteeheehee. Do excuse my wrinkled pants. I don't own an iron at home and I can't be bothered to steam all my clothes that require some straightening out. I'm not that fastidious.
Heaved a sigh of relief when I stepped into Plain Meredith at 11am. It was empty. LOL The lunch crowd would come slightly later. A week day morning meant that we could have a chat in fairly quiet surroundings and air-conditioning. Word of warning — don't bother coming here for actual food and coffee if your table doesn't include a dog. The menu isn't particularly delicious.
Smol Girl sat quietly with me. The clients were stunned by her demeanour and poise. They couldn't believe that she carried herself so well. Ahemmm. I think she clinched me this work project. Hurrah. An unexpected welcomed deal when I work freelance. Oof. I signed the contract there and then for three pieces of work, with the first one due in 48 hours. Good job, Choya. I'll get you a beautiful piece of grass-fed tenderloin.
Work has been hectic. That's a welcomed form of busy since I'm put on a retainer by some firms, and get paid by per project/case/paper by other agencies. I churn out translated legal agreements and contracts one after another on a tight deadline. If I'm on a retainer, I can't decline work, and those cover a 24-hour to 48-hour turnaround deadlines, of which I meet without much difficulty. Translation work is my bread and butter, and I do a specialized form of it which pays superbly. The work is highly confidential and I keep them that way. I rarely talk about work now on the blog or with friends or even with the husband since I can't quite discuss the content. Heh.
After submitting some papers within 72 hours and closing two short-term projects, I had a four-day window of leisure. So I binge-watched all the television shows I had put on hold for the month. LOL I never choose to watch cerebral films or anything 'award-winning'. My brain cells are fried. I have absolutely no space to absorb intellectual art films or anything requiring extra brain capacity to process. GIMME CORDYCEPS, ZOMBIES AND VAMPIRES.
I've been binge-watching different episodes of 'Hot Ones', hosted by Sean Evans. Well, this whole series isn't a film. It's episode of episodes of watching celebrities eat hot wings and see how hot sauces kill their tastebuds. I don't watch every episode — I pick out the celebrities I want to see. Dave Grohl ate the wings like a champ. If that's your thing, catch them 19 seasons (we're on Season 20 now) all shown on YouTube. The show concept is created by Christopher Schonberger and Sean Evans, and produced by First We Feast and Complex Media.
Every celebrity wants to be on the show. Sean Evans is such a fun host. He also eats the wings together with his guests. Gosh. He's got that deadpan face, good vibes and a voice made for television. It's quite cool for the show to also do vegan and vegetarian options for guests who prefer that. I'm sooo entertained because I'm not fond of hot sauces. My issue is not with the heat. I don't like peppers and that sort of fiery spice flavors. I prefer it when spicy foods and sauces come in the form of sambal or in an Asian chilli sauce. Not as hot sauce.
I usually enjoy watching Gordon Ramsay's shows. He's so bloody entertaining. On 'Hot Ones', he was completely hilarious. I loved his two episodes best! He spat out 134 "fucks" on his first time on the show in 2019. Yeah, they counted. Hahaha. He returned for a holiday extravaganza appearance in 2021, all prepared with his own peanut butter and cream, for a second run at the wings and hot sauces. That was HILARIOUS.
The clip above has Sean Evans talk about Season 19's hot sauce line-up. We're onto Season 20, and the line up of hot sauces is still insane. There's this one called 'Da' Bomb Beyond Insanity' that's in every season as the #8 sauce on the challenge; it's made with habanero and chipotle peppers, rated at 135,600 Scoville Units. Apparently there's something in the taste of 'Da' Bomb' that's really horrid; everyone hates it. WTF. There're forums talking about the Scoville levels, and I definitely do not want to even taste the 10th and final wing, which is slathered with a hot sauce of 2 million+ Scoville units. If you like hot sauces, you could definitely buy them and erm..... challenge your tastebuds with it. *shudder
In a random conversation with the BFF, I said that the work pace is picking up, and her text came back, "What work are you doing?!". I was like, !!!!! She didn't think I had work projects till March or something. Helloooooo, I would like a continuous stream of income, monthly. The inflation is worrisome. She sometimes forgets that I still have a respectable income that is supplied by actual corporate entities and not disbursed from a family office. 😂
I rarely blog about work nowadays because I'm not involved in office gossip, politics or power play. Heh. I like it this way. I don't work in a permanent team. I'm otherwise known as a 'vendor' to the clients, or the interpreter, or the facilitator. I'm not a 'consultant'. I hate that word. I'm just a corporate minion doing freelance work, and that suits me fine. Little stress, few obligations and very focused deadlines with fixed parameters. I enjoy that. I highly doubt I'll ever return to working full-time in an office environment. Also, I'm 44 this year, and with what I do, it's gonna be hard getting back to a mover-shaker role with a giant part of my resume touting as 'freelance minion' for the past... decade... My mode of seeking an income has changed, and the nature of my chosen work projects meant that I do have a decent freedom of choice. I wouldn't trade these in.
Freelance projects mean that I get a lot of flexibility in deciding when to sit down to churn out papers. Of course I would have to field long calls and occasionally take an ART to step into a physical office for some meetings, but mostly, I get full say over how to spend the 17+ waking hours. I used to portion quite a fair bit of time to the gyms and pilates studios. Now, a lot of it goes to fulfilling the dog's physical and mental needs. (I'll never encourage anyone to raise a dog. Get a cat. They're way easier on your schedule.)
I'm uneasy about the state of world affairs. Democracy has gone bonkers. The pandemic has enabled dictators and strait-laced governments to clamp down on independent thought and speech, as well as tighten social controls, in the name of the greater good. I'm pensive. It's not a one-week funk or whatever. I'm not in the doldrums and neither am I slipping into depression. It's this air of pessimism that I can't shake off. I don't feel the need to shake it off either.
I carry this pensiveness from December 2021 into 2022, and it's likely to stay through the year. I hate it that when shit finally hits the fan, I'll no longer be young and fit. I'll be hard-pressed to keep up. The world's economy kinda sucks right now. Costs go up and inflation is inherent in every generation. We will feel it when our earning power decreases and our monetary reserves remain static and nothing else comes in. If I don't die in the next decade, I'll have to figure out how to feed and house myself without burning a giant hole through the wallet or giving it all to hospital bills.
That day, I whispered a little prayer of thanks for another huge project secured, signed and sealed. It was unexpected, something that I didn't aggressively pursue, but simply asked. It happened and I can't be more grateful. This project would pay my bills and support mini charity projects through 2022. I'm really enjoying this freelance / project-basis model of work. I'm fine with the uncertainty of income, since it does average out fine year on year. My expenses have pretty much stabilized, pending unforeseen accidents.
The man and I are lucky to hold jobs that provide a steady income. The man's mode is more regular than mine, of course. I do gigs. Hahaha. We're privileged enough to have access to funds to generate greater savings. We don't know if 'retirement' is in our vocabulary. Work is fulfilling, to a large extent. I don't think that the traditional definition of 'retirement' is applicable anymore. It's impossible to depend on savings when there's inflation and economic uncertainty. Retirement would require continuous income in one form or another.
I had to read Nick Romeo's opinion published in The New Yorker on March 23, 2021, 'Should Gig Work Be Government Run?' It's still very theoretical (economic), but it's being played out and accelerated in the pandemic where the traditional model of jobs have been thrown topsy-turvy.
In 2019, California reclassified some part-time and gig workers as employees rather than contractors, enabling them to be entitled to paid sick leave, guaranteed minimum wage and a host of company benefits otherwise out of reach for them.
This article highlighted the gig economy, and a loud voice advocating fair regulations and participation through labor reformer and Director of Beyond Jobs in Britain, Wingham Rowan. He advocated for the new law in California on the ballot on Proposition 22, or Prop. 22. It passed in November 2020, and it's the most expensive ballot measure in history. It's very American and UK centric, so when I read it, I had to adjust it for the tiny Singapore context, before filling out to a larger region. A vibrant market for irregular labor available constantly. These are very fun labor economic theories to ponder about.
Would this work in Singapore? Well, Singapore is regulating a lot of companies and how they earn their money, especially if it's of public interest. But it doesn't fully immerse itself into how people organize it. Unless it's like AirBnB where we aren't exactly allowed to do it. The pandemic aid measures reached out to gig workers. As far as statistics reveal, the people who need the boost, got it, if they fall within the criteria set out. But our artists, actors and entertainers have been hard-hit by the drastic drop of income, revenue streams and a complete lack of jobs when live entertainment was banned.
Rowan wants to push the employers and also the government to join in creating gig platforms for people. He pretty much advocates the flourishing of a microeconomy in the big cities. In there, lies a lot of trust in the integrity of these workers, or to trust your small sellers and suppliers. I don't know if a government-run platform would work. How would it be regulated unless it touches a public service, like transport? Food delivery has been thrown into the limelight, obviously, and also for the wrong reasons, like how loansharks use food delivery orders to harass households who owe them money. For the other small businesses, I suppose our Shopee, Lazada and Carouhell suffice for now.
Rowan divides gig workers into three categories. There are the “voluntary irregulars,” who choose to take on gigs such as driving for Lyft or similar companies. There are the “forced irregulars,” who want full-time jobs but can’t find them, and so turn to gig work out of necessity. Finally, there are the “core irregulars,” who can’t work full time because of medical or family circumstances and depend on gig work for its flexibility. “Maybe I have back pain that comes and goes, so I don’t know if I can work tomorrow—I’ll know when I wake up,” Rowan said. “Maybe I have two parents with Alzheimer’s. Can I work tomorrow? I’ll have to decide at lunchtime.”
For people in the latter two categories, especially, gig work is a badly fraying lifeline. In 2019, the Federal Reserve reported that fifty-eight per cent of full-time gig workers said that they would find it hard to come up with four hundred dollars in the event of an emergency. And yet for some people the flexibility and spontaneity of gig work is a boon. In reforming or rethinking the system, the challenge is keeping the good aspects while minimizing the bad.
I don't look to my husband to provide for me, especially in terms of medical insurance and medical bills. Those will be killer as we age, and it's unfair for him to take that on. I have made provisions for myself in terms of medical and hospitalization insurance coverage. That's what insurance companies are for. They hedge, we hedge. Death, is considered lucky. What's scary, will be the huge disability bills incurred. And well, if and when Alzheimer's comes knocking.
I'll not presume to know another's worries. What I'm concerned with, is to keep my level of income in ratio with inflation. That, is a challenge. In my gig work, age isn't much of an issue because with increasing age, comes experience. And that shows on the papers submitted. My work doesn't come cheap, and I won't compromise on the rates I charge because the quality of work has to be upkept. As long as I am able to earn my own income, I will.
Never had a shoe rack because we do have a shoe cabinet at the back. I didn't bother to build a cabinet for shoes at the front door. However, with the addition of the dog and daily walks, I'd need to toggle the logistics of having a space at the front door that could hold a few pairs of our shoes for a quick run outside, and also to have the dog's barang-barang conveniently located for late-night diarrhea-runs, daily walks and clean-ups.
One year and three months of living with a dog have found some equilibrium, I know the amount of extra space needed for her things, and what we need to prep her for going out and washing her feet when she comes home. In a small flat, wall space is a luxury. While cupboards and shelves are great space savers, I try not to go trigger-happy with building those. I generally don't like frames on the walls either. It doesn't matter if it's a photo or a painting or a print. As long as it's a frame hung on the wall, it creeps me out. I love a blank wall. Calming. I try to leave as many blank walls as possible.
When I don't want anything permanent affixed to the walls, IKEA is my answer. Bought a shoe rack. Of course I fixed it up all on my own. The man was of no help, of course. YAWN. I'm Miss Fix-It in this home. This IKEA shoe rack works for now. It's mobile enough to be removed if necessary, or be thrown out if we need the space for any other reason. The purchases arrived in one afternoon. I already have those storage containers lying around. Just needed to shift them onto the shoe rack. Fixed it all up in forty-five minutes. It looked okay. Not too jarring on the eye. The logistic flow of going in and out of the flat with the dog is so much smoother. Now, I just need to think of more ways to neaten it. Heh.
Meeting various people for coffee used to be such a common daily occurrence. When I actually like having a conversation with these humans (clients or acquaintances) and are happy to head out of the office conference room, but don't want to sit down for an extended meal with them, getting a coffee somewhere is a great compromise.
Now I avoid it. Work doesn't require me to meet potential clients over coffee anymore. Pre-COVID-19, video calls are the norm. Now, it’s fairly standard. Also, I don't need worry about getting more projects till next year. I'm immensely grateful that I have paying projects secured for this year till next July. Having a cup of coffee in a cafe now is a once-a-week or at most twice-a-week affair with the friends I see regularly.
Popped into Gather for a late afternoon coffee. J texted to say that she was late but she was in a cab. I LOVE FRIENDS LIKE THIS. All the people I call 'friends' are the type who wouldn't make me wait for anything more than 30 minutes without telling me why. They're efficient and sane. Not an ounce of inflated sense of privilege or self-entitlement in them. (I'm very stingy with my definition of 'friends'. Knowing someone for x number of years don't make them one.) In return, they get absolute friend privileges from me happily waiting for them. Hahaha. I wouldn't exactly be waiting. I would be reading, or clearing emails, or having a drink first.
Today, Gather’s coffee machine was down. They were tinkering with it and there was hope that it would be back in operation in 30 minutes. Perfect. Coffee later then. J should arrive by then. It would sad if she couldn't get a coffee because she also hadn't sat down at a cafe for ages! I was hungry, so I ate first. Uncharacteristically, I ordered a sweet crêpe of fig and camembert, with fig jam and honey. Hahahah. The fruits that topped the crêpe were sour-ish; with each bite, they managed to help balance out the sugar.
When my last project wrapped in July, and the confirmed and signed new projects won't fully begin till next February, I thought I was done for the year, and could solely concentrate on training the dog. Heh. Then a flurry of emails resulted in a sudden (welcomed) flood of work in August that has kept me busy. These will wrap at the end of the month.
I had a bit of an issue with scheduling. These pieces of work require more than just churning out translations and pieces of analysis. I've had to turn up at meetings, briefings and facilitation sessions. It has been stressful trying to juggle work hours and caring for a dog prone to paw-chomping and separation anxiety. I was hard pressed to even squeeze out time to meet friends for leisurely meals or coffee! We had to do many meet-and-run dates. Now that the projects are winding down and the dog finally gets that she will be alone for a few hours in the day, I can breathe a little easier.
By God's grace, I've had (and will have) a steady stream of paid projects coming my way. The best thing, these paymasters are prompt (within 30 days) and aren't the type who would ask for a 'discount' or bargain for extra paperwork, etc. These projects have been challenging but very fun, satisfying a part of the academic brain that should be kept well-oiled. The nature of freelance work is unpredictable, and every year, I can never quite tell if I'll hit my ideal annual income. If I do, I count my blessings. For six years now, I've been incredibly lucky to be able to secure sustained work, and merrily grumble about having to pay income tax.
After one such morning of killing the brain cells,
it felt great to take a break for lunch, and coffee at platform..
The contractor has handed back the keys. I've also swopped out to a digital door lock, and I guess this ends the renovation. All in all, the contractor has followed the schedule, didn't kertok us or stinge on the quality of the materials or the workmanship. Everything has been done to our satisfaction, and we'll just shrug off the little things.
Whatever minor fixes and touch-ups in future will be under 'warranty', so to speak. Of course I'll know which are the additional payment that would have to be done if there're other non-renovation work-related issues. I still blink each time I think of the way I've hired the contractor. We didn't sign a contract. (I know riiiight!) After the initial hardcopy invoices, every other itemized bill was agreed upon via photographs. We did everything that the renovation forums tell people not to do, and our contractor works in a way that’s scary. No respectable lawyer would do this. 🤣 Like I said, I place my trust in my friends, and when my friends' homes have been recently renovated by this same dude, I'll take my chances.
Delays are part and parcel of home renovation. But largely, these delays are justifiable. The contractor has been very efficient, responsive and discreet. I have no idea what the industry practice is, but I thought that instead of buying a gift by way of thanks for the contractor and his crew, an ang pow would be more practical, and probably better appreciated. Hehehe.
And now for a ton of home cleaning. Ugh. Then it’s another round of expected screw-ups with the delivery of electrical appliances and furniture. I still haven’t decided if I would ever fix up the doorbell (which has been bought).
My final work project for the year has begun in earnest and while fun, it's fairly intense. Lots of reading to catch up on, and I have to put aside my usual genres of fantasy and horror in order to read all these sober and solemn papers. Eeeps.
Anyway, I was reading up essays for work, and up popped the name Francis Fukuyama. Then I found Louis Menand's opinion in The New Yorker's September 3 2018 issue and couldn't stop laughing at his thoughts in his article, 'Francis Fukuyama Postpones the End of History'.
All of us who majored in political science would have taken a private stance when it comes to Francis Fukuyama's postulation(s) in his 'The End of History and the Last Man' (1992). The lecturer/author/political scientist put forth the eventual global triumph of political and economic liberalism. Well. Africa in the nineties was madness. Helloooo, China? I read it in 2000 at 22 years old, and thought the book gave rather sketchy theories and held premature ideas. But I suppose when you write political theories and assumptions towards the end of the dramatic Cold War era, looking only at Europe and America, it kinda turns out like that because one can't predict the future.
Twenty-nine years later, it seems that the realists haven’t gone anywhere, and that history has a few more tricks up its sleeve. It turns out that liberal democracy and free trade may actually be rather fragile achievements. (Consumerism appears safe for now.) There is something out there that doesn’t like liberalism, and is making trouble for the survival of its institutions.
Francis Fukuyama couldn't have predicted a shift of world politics either. Liberal democracy is something to aspire to for many political parties pre-1989, even for people in East Asia and Southeast Asia. Today, while it's an aspirational model still, other political models have largely critiqued it, and it's a painful model to study in 2018. Look at America's political winds that plonked a largely Conservative Republican on the world's stage who seems pretty enamored with non liberal democratic practices. Then Brexit, then dunno what else there might be to come.
To that, I'm really not sure if I want to read his upcoming new book, 'Identity: The Demand for Dignity and the Politics of Resentment'(September 2018). The article mentioned that "The desire for recognition, Fukuyama argues, is an essential threat to liberalism."Francis Fukuyama's new book is a discourse on identity politics. He has a name for this desire of recognition- thymos.
He says that thymos is “a universal aspect of human nature that has always existed.” In the Republic, thymos is distinct from the two other parts of the soul that Socrates names: reason and appetite. Appetites we share with animals; reason is what makes us human. Thymos is in between.
Okay, to be very honest, I kinda share the view and theories of Samuel Huntington, since my old university thesis (It allowed me to graduate with honors, thanks to the real work that had to be done for it) totally referenced the hypothesis in'The Clash of Civilizations and the Remaking of the World' (1996). Of course Samuel Huntington has his detractors as well, and it's hard to argue the destruction of civilizations when people are turning on their own uhhh species. Francis Fukuyama spent all his academic career combating the theory.
Louis Menand's final two paragraphs sum it up his thoughts, of which I rather agree with, since world politics and the wishes of a people can never be categorized neatly.
Wouldn’t it be important to distinguish people who ultimately don’t want differences to matter, like the people involved in #MeToo and Black Lives Matter, from people who ultimately do want them to matter, like isis militants, Brexit voters, or separatist nationalists? And what about people who are neither Mexican nor immigrants and who feel indignation at the treatment of Mexican immigrants? Black Americans risked their lives for civil rights, but so did white Americans. How would Socrates classify that behavior? Borrowed thymos?
It might also be good to replace the linear “if present trends continue” conception of history as a steady progression toward some stable state with the dialectical conception of history that Hegel and Kojève in fact used. Present trends don’t continue. They produce backlashes and reshufflings of the social deck. The identities that people embrace today are the identities their children will want to escape from tomorrow. History is somersaults all the way to the end. That’s why it’s so hard to write, and so hard to predict. Unless you’re lucky.
This is a crazy period at work for the man. He's facing loads of changes and challenges, and plenty of work trips out for a week or two at a time since June. He thoughtfully asked if I would be okay handling the bulk of the renovation and accompanying nitty-gritty details on my own. I almost cackled. YES. ABSOLUTELY.
The man's not uncontactable. Time differences, sure, but there aren't any major issues to that. I do not need his permission or approval or whatever. This isn't a 'boss and subordinate' relationship. I'd prefer to handle all of it myself, and checking in with the man now and then. In fact, I'd rather make all the executive decisions. Hurhurhur. But yes, communication channels are open and updated.
Of course the man has a say. He knows when to open his mouth. I only need to manage his sense of logistics and timing. If what he wants can't be done, I'll take a deep breath and patiently explain why. I know that not everyone understands plumbing, electricals and such. 😂 I literally wilted when I realized that the man didn't know how to manually draw or open the blinds. OMG. (He has never had blinds in any apartment ever. It has always been curtains or motorized hotel blinds.) No wonder he wants motorized blinds in the new flat!!!
So glad I factored in time for delays and hiccups. Water pipe holes, leaks and all, the entire renovation schedule has been pretty much adhered to. It honestly hasn't been stressful, only because I treat it like how I deal with work projects. I love looking into details and looking for solutions to niggly problems. The man and I are making this into a livable space, not a showroom. I knew what I'm willing to let go of and what I'm not. Chips, rough surfaces and imperfections make this flat a home. And I know every story behind a dink or a scratch.
Chuckled to myself when I assembled all our IKEA items. The contractor had earlier offered one of his workmen to come fix it for me on a separate day later on. But I had time that day. IKEA items don't require much thought or work, except for a screwdriver and spanner. The DIY instructions are really clear; everything is literally idiot-proof. With the digital door lock installed, the renovation is winding down. What's left is to clean house, have all the furniture delivered, and hope nothing else breaks down. 🤞🏻
When I met the contractor's carpenter, within 15 minutes, I knew he would be reliable in terms of using good quality materials and experienced builders. He understood loads and weight distribution, but he wouldn't have any sense of aesthetics. His recommendations, basically, sucked, suitable for television stage sets stuck in the hostels in the 1960s.
So I took a stronger lead in terms of design for the carpentry work needed, right down to the nitty-gritty, and even to the extent of suggesting mounting options for shelves. The one room that I wasn't that fixated on, is the utility room. It's a fairly standard utility room! I thought I would dictate all that I wanted, but left one thing to him. And that would be installing the wall hooks.
A few (rectifiable) screw-ups here and there would be forgivable. But even in a room so small, he screwed up cutlery drawers, among other things. But this was quite ultimate. SUPER HILARIOUS. I wasn't even annoyed. I literally stood there and laughed for a whole minute. I couldn't believe he thought this was okay! Am I being trolled? I asked for hooks on the wall to hang broomsticks or whatever. I got these:
I was like, SERIOUSLY? I complained to my contractor. He hadn't seen it yet. He replied me with emojis. He was just as amused, horrified and rather stunned. He immediately went out to buy me some proper hooks to replace this piece of fugliness, and told me that he'd scold the carpenter. Oh yes, please do. Duhhhh.
As the renovation and carpentry work progressed, I was even more persnickety about being present at the installation of cabinets. Let's just say that it was a good judgment call to watch the carpenter's men at work. Imagine if his workmen went along with his instructions, and I'm less vigilant, I'd have keeled over at the end results. I would totally make him un-install the various unlikeable things. We would have gotten into dumb and unproductive arguments about costs and compensation. Well. One can't account for another's sense of aesthetics. 😐🤷🏻♀️ I was really thinking of having hooks along these lines, with images sourced from Pinterest.
