Being Pensive in 2022

In a random conversation with the BFF, I said that the work pace is picking up, and her text came back, "What work are you doing?!". I was like, !!!!! She didn't think I had work projects till March or something. Helloooooo, I would like a continuous stream of income, monthly. The inflation is worrisome. She sometimes forgets that I still have a respectable income that is supplied by actual corporate entities and not disbursed from a family office. 😂 

I rarely blog about work nowadays because I'm not involved in office gossip, politics or power play. Heh. I like it this way. I don't work in a permanent team. I'm otherwise known as a 'vendor' to the clients, or the interpreter, or the facilitator. I'm not a 'consultant'. I hate that word. I'm just a corporate minion doing freelance work, and that suits me fine. Little stress, few obligations and very focused deadlines with fixed parameters. I enjoy that. I highly doubt I'll ever return to working full-time in an office environment. Also, I'm 44 this year, and with what I do, it's gonna be hard getting back to a mover-shaker role with a giant part of my resume touting as 'freelance minion' for the past... decade... My mode of seeking an income has changed, and the nature of my chosen work projects meant that I do have a decent freedom of choice. I wouldn't trade these in.  

Freelance projects mean that I get a lot of flexibility in deciding when to sit down to churn out papers. Of course I would have to field long calls and occasionally take an ART to step into a physical office for some meetings, but mostly, I get full say over how to spend the 17+ waking hours. I used to portion quite a fair bit of time to the gyms and pilates studios. Now, a lot of it goes to fulfilling the dog's physical and mental needs. (I'll never encourage anyone to raise a dog. Get a cat. They're way easier on your schedule.)

I'm uneasy about the state of world affairs. Democracy has gone bonkers. The pandemic has enabled dictators and strait-laced governments to clamp down on independent thought and speech, as well as tighten social controls, in the name of the greater good. I'm pensive. It's not a one-week funk or whatever. I'm not in the doldrums and neither am I slipping into depression. It's this air of pessimism that I can't shake off. I don't feel the need to shake it off either.  

I carry this pensiveness from December 2021 into 2022, and it's likely to stay through the year. I hate it that when shit finally hits the fan, I'll no longer be young and fit. I'll be hard-pressed to keep up. The world's economy kinda sucks right now. Costs go up and inflation is inherent in every generation. We will feel it when our earning power decreases and our monetary reserves remain static and nothing else comes in. If I don't die in the next decade, I'll have to figure out how to feed and house myself without burning a giant hole through the wallet or giving it all to hospital bills.