The HR director invited me for a chat yesterday at 5pm. Our organization believed in doing a 360 degrees feedback exercise for a portion of its employees and I wished to opt out. She was a little concerned. I told her why- as a result of this rather shocking management change, I intended to leave by year's end and it wasn't necessary to waste the organization's resources on me.
There is no way I could transfer the loyalty I have for this boss to a new one. I'm not confident that this new boss is able to change her management style that has been her identifying trait in another department for a good 10 years. I've seen and heard enough to know that her style will not sit well with me. This is not a challenge to surmount. It's a confrontation I choose to avoid. Mind you, this is separate from the other part of me that is cognizant of the good the new boss will bring to the department and this change is necessary for the organization to move forward. That is an unstoppable tsunami. And, I don't have to accept or welcome it.
Yes, go ahead and groan- I also brought my bear in for this chat. (I very emo wat!) The HR director was so sweet as to say hi to the bear and not roll her eyes too much. I've already declared my intention to leave before the year is out. I will honor that and submit my formal notice in due time. My boss leaves at the end of September. So the tears must dry in order for me to properly enjoy the last couple of busy yet carefree months in the department.
I appeared in the office today with slightly swollen eyes. To the colleagues' credit, no one commented on the ugly eye bags and asked if it had been a rough night. They knew. Due to that stoopid rain, I was a little late for the morning event, but in time to greet the arriving foreign dignitaries. Still, I was received by a big warm bear hug and lots of smiles and laughter. Such sweet colleagues I have.
Glad that I didn't have to stay in the office today. I was on my feet most of the time. I was so grateful for something to do, instead of letting the thoughts run wild or feeling emo again. They made me the emcee for an afternoon event. It kept me occupied with lots of conversation and schmoozing.
Even better, the day ended with a spectacular view of the city skyline from the hotel-guests'-only portion of the Sands SkyPark on the 57th floor. I took a few quiet minutes in a corner. The respite was enough for me to know that I wouldn't cry again over this. And that's not necessarily a positive sign.
4 comments:
you are a loyal and faithful person, to your work and your boss.
say hi to your bear for me.
a corporate bear! woooo!
It takes courage to make such a decision *hugs* :)
You'll always have your trusty bear to rely on during tough times. Go easy on yourself over the weekend!
So sad that good things don't last forever. I have read how you and your team have been working well together and enjoying the work. And when there is a change in management who doesn't know the work well (or believe in it) and just want to do thing their own way, instead of listening to the experiences of people, it just spoils everything. I hope you and your team could continue to accomplish what are good/right for the organisation and stakeholder/customers and the new boss will see some light. You have been great to stand by your team mates during this period and upcoming months.
tuti: hehe. i will say hi to the bear for ya.
joooness: bears stay constant.
coboypb: sigh. so very true.
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